sometimes when things stop making sense it’s best to slowly remove yourself from everything & become a secret little ghost. unplugging your phone, leaving the internet, refusing to speak. you can drift through your days in a fog & not think much about anything because thinking would lead to too many things & your frail little heart may be too full of sadness to really want to bring those things up. well my handsome little ghosties, usually this hiding away only leads to being a ghost much longer than anticipated. these ghostly vacations do not solve anything. they store your problems in a locked case deep in your glass hearts & once the box is full it will explode & then & then & then you’ll be haunted. let’s try something new. ghost to ghost secret: it will be tough & it may hurt a tiny bit but think of how bad a glass-heart explosion could hurt! grab my hand & please listen: being a ghost is oh so easy but is it as satisfying as we first believed? no no no. so let’s change. it will take a very brave heart. we must say what we believe! fight for what we believe! never back down. we must call on our close friends when we just feel like escaping. we must NOT escape. we must say yes to invitations to be surrounded by people who truly care. we must say no when we mean no. we must say yes when our heart says ‘yes yes yes’ but our fears make us want to say ‘no no no’. we must TALK. we must share our silly stories. we must not fear how we come off to strangers. we must believe that the people who will love us & stay with us will be drawn to everything we do, every piece of our unlocked heart they see. being a ghost is quite easy & the easy way hardly ever leads to the most rewarding outcome.

let’s grab hands & watch the colour return to our cheeks.

this was what motivated me to stop being a ghost. to start living, start taking chances.

today I went to the pool with my friends. got an okay tan. instant confidence booster. i called a few friends, apologized for being an ass/not calling back/not following through on plans. they were all lovely, it was simpler than expected.

i also got my hair done.

with pretty hair & rose-tinted cheeks, when i look in the mirror, i do not desire to punch that reflection.

baby steps :)